Thursday, January 06, 2005

Must be the monayyy!

One man's account about Hell on the CTA. (Not the missing post but had to share this as well.)


Date: 01.06.05
Climate: barren tundra
xbox: empty
Reading: stephan tennant
Watching: chess on the laptop
Listening to: meat is murder
Eating: burger
Drinking: sprite

The Gaylords new years eve show was out of hand. 500+ crammed into greg’s humble apartment. From what I can remember, which is barely anything, everyone had a wild time.

Ps:On the way to garret’s to record I had the most traumatic train ride of my life. No, it didn’t fall off the tracks and burst into flames, although at the time I was praying that it would. This was worse. See, habitually I take the last seat in the last car of the train because I like knowing that no one is behind me, -plus it’s usually more secluded. Well on this occasion some one else had the same idea, and sat just to my left. Only this wasn’t just "some one". This was the embodiment of all that can be annoying. -A veritable cornucopia of irritating traits designed by god and aimed at me. He was in his mid 20s, and was showcasing so many of my pet peeves simultaneously that I was literally getting hot and panicked. I had shortness of breath and was swallowing a lot and sweating –like a bad fever. It was a metaphysical cyclone, and I felt like I was drowning.

Ok, I’ll lay it out but i'm typing fast because the memory is too painful.
First, his trusty terrycloth sweat suit was the color and texture of baby shit.
Second, he had his walkman on and was blasting hip hop (“hey must be the monayyy!”).
Third, he was talking on his cell phone in bad grammar, but get this, he kept his headphones ON during his pointless conversation so he had to shout to hear his own voice, and kept asking his friend on the other line to repeat themselves. “Say what? Yo! You bring up some a dat Tennessee shwag? Say what? Ha! ha! say what?!”)
Fourth, and this is the kicker, and I’m not lying: he was cracking pistachios with his teeth and spitting the shells out on to the seat and a couple bounced on to my lap. I was so overwhelmed and consumed that I almost broke out into fucking hives. I started to write this journal because it was all I could do to keep from pulling the emergency lever. I’m sure the commissioner would have understood.

Last year I saw The Exorcist all the way through. I jumped a couple times, but still I slept like a baby that night. This went down 2 days ago and I haven’t slept yet.

Posted by Mat at 11:16 AM

3 comments:

guiam said...

this is sooo funny! sounds like some people i know.

Aleksu said...

When I was new arrival in my town I experienced something similar, I gave the punk the Eyes of Doom Look and he shrinked ten inches.

The friend that was next to me and had already yielded to him was amazed when he yielded to us.

Five years in Mexico City is something not many punks like the one you described would survive.

guiam said...

you're from mexico city, blex?